Paired to Perfection
Episode 4: What’s Wrong with Lassie?
Black Rifle Murdered Out
Dark | Bold | Strong
“For all of you night riders out there, we proudly present our darkest coffee yet: Murdered Out.
With tasting notes of smoky molasses and dark chocolate, this extra dark coffee packs a full punch without being too bitter. Its smooth flavor will fuel your midnight ops or your morning commute. It's always the perfect time to join the dark side.
Each bag you buy helps us give more to the veteran community. Thank you for supporting America's Coffee.”
Squad Rating: 9/10 but definitely a 12/10 with added booze
James Loveless
March 11, 1963 — June 14, 2023
Born and raised in Kentucky in 1963—a state that has been recently leaning toward more liberal values, we might add—Jamie, a divorcee, father, grandfather, and proud owner of a few lots in the trailer park, had had enough and up and died on us on June 14th in order to avoid another Presidential stolen-election mishap in the near future. ... read more
As a gluttonous eater of fried foods and snack cakes, as well as the occasional chili cheese dog, James tried in vain to give up the ghost by clogging his arteries and having a stroke in 2015. His twin boys, Rocky and Rodney, had other plans and made him go to the hospital. While waiting in the ER at the hospital, he was heard saying, "Let's make a break for it!", only to be heard by one of the hospital staff and forced to go through the procedure. He wasn't too excited about the prospect but went anyway.
On many occasions in life, James was seen in his backyard at the trailer park during the early hours of the morning, hammering beers, standing over country-style ribs, and yelling, "It's got a head like a cat on it!", while nearby neighbors would peek out their windows bearing looks of disgust and amazement, as his party guests were slurring remarks about needing to speed up his cooking style. "We've been here since 5 o'clock," they would say. "I've got work in the morning."
We don't know if he was married, but he definitely was a lady's man. There was Kathy, Mary Lou, Tammy, Debra, Carrie, Tina, etc., etc. "It's the bones," he told us as he proudly pointed to his skinny, pasty-white legs. "Women love a good shin." We think he might even have some females waiting for him on the other side.
Jamie loved his family more than anything else in the world... except ice-cold Busch, room-temperature Busch, T-bones, New York strip, prime rib, shrimp, swimming, poker, hatch-back Mustang GTs, tank tops, Kentucky Men's basketball, and his personal copy of *Eddie Murphy's Raw.*
He leaves behind his second-favorite son, Rocky (and Lizeth) Loveless of Arizona City, AZ, his favorite son, Rodney Loveless of Science Hill, KY, a younger brother, Joey, and unofficial daughter Melissa (and Coy) Vance of the trailer park, as well as a pair of old boxers which have "Buttweiser the King of Rears" printed on the design. He will be moderately missed.
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Episode 5: My Bloody Valentine
Boozy Truffles by Chocolat by Adam Turoni
Decadent | Rich | Velvety
“As a graduate of the Culinary Institute of America, Adam’s philosophy about chocolate is to tell a story through flavors.”
Mint Julep Truffle: A one bite dark chocolate cup filled with a muddled organic mint fondant, finished with Makers Mark Bourbon and topped with candied mint leaves.
Blood Orange Truffle: Dark chocolate butter ganache infused with a blood orange puree and Grand Marnier, topped with a house made candied orange square.
Georgia Peach Truffle: White chocolate cream center infused with peach preserves and peach liqueur. Finished in a white chocolate shell covered in locally roasted pecans.
Raspberry Chambord Truffle: Milk & dark chocolate butter ganache infused with a raspberry puree and Chambord. They are finished with a white chocolate layer and topped with a dark chocolate petal dusted in raspberry dust.
Squad Rating: 10’s, 10’s, 10’s across the board
Walter George Bruhl Jr.
April 20, 1933 — March 9, 2014
Walter George Bruhl Jr. of Newark and Dewey Beach, DE, is a dead person. He is no more. He is bereft of life. He has wrung down the curtain and gone to join the choir invisible. He has expired and gone to meet his maker. ... read more
He drifted off this mortal coil on March 9, 2014, at his home. His spirit was released from his worn-out shell of a body and is now exploring the universe.
He was surrounded by his loving wife of 57 years, Helene Sellers Bruhl, who will now be able to purchase the mink coat he had always refused her because he believed only minks should wear mink, his two sons, their wives, and his four grandchildren.
Walt was preceded in death by his tonsils and adenoids in 1935, a spinal disc in 1974, a large piece of his thyroid gland in 1988, and his prostate on March 27, 2000.
He was born in Philadelphia, PA, on April 20, 1933, at 10:38 PM and weighed in at a healthy 7 lbs. 4 oz. and was 22″ long to Blanche Buckman Bruhl and Walter George Bruhl.
Walter was a Marine Corps Veteran of the Korean War, having served from October 1951 to September 1954, with overseas duty in Japan from June 1953 to August 1953. He attained the rank of Sergeant. He chose this path because of Hollywood propaganda to which he succumbed as a child during WWII and his cousin Ella, who joined the Corps in 1943.
He served an electronics apprenticeship at the Philadelphia Naval Yard from 1956 till 1961, operated Atlantic Automotive Service Stations in Wilmington during 1961 and 1962, and was employed by the late great DuPont Co. from 1962 through 1993.
He started at Chestnut Run Site as a flunky in the weave area of the Textile Fibers Dept., and then was promoted to research assistant where he stayed from 1963 through 1972. In 1972, he accepted a position as an equipment service representative with the Photo Products Dept. at the old DuPont Airport Site (now Barley Mill Plaza).
In 1973, he was promoted to Manufacturing Engineering Technologist and was employed in that capacity until, after 31 years with The Co., he was given a fine anniversary dinner and
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Episode 6: There’s Been a Murdah… in Savannah
Savannah’s (In)Famous Chatham Artillery Punch
Strong | Boozy | Blackout Inducing
“While the official inventor of the drink is unknown, it was believed to have been created by the local militia, the Chatham Artillery, to welcome the Republican Blues back from a military drill in Macon in the 1800s, but some references date it even earlier.
Referenced in the film adaptation of Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, the punch is said to be three parts fruit, seven parts liquor, whatever’s available on both counts.
Those who have studied the drink claim the original was simply just lemon juice, sugar, rum, brandy, whiskey, and Champagne, but either way that’s enough alcohol to bring an elephant down.”
Brews & Obituaries Recipe
2 Cups Paul Masson Brandy 2 Cups Meyers Dark Jamaican Rum 2 Cups Four Roses Bourbon Freshly Squeezed Lemon Juice Topped with Champagne Garnished with lemon peels soaked in simple syrup for 3 days and served over ice
Squad Rating: 10/10 will kill you
William Freddie McCullough
February 3, 1952 - September 11, 2013
The man. The myth. The legend. Men wanted to be him and women wanted to be with him. William Freddie McCullough died on September 11, 2013. ... read more
Freddie loved deep-fried Southern food smothered in Cane Syrup, fishing at Santee Cooper Lake, Little Debbie Cakes, Two and a Half Men, beautiful women, Reese's Cups, and Jim Beam. Not necessarily in that order. He hated vegetables and hypocrites. Not necessarily in that order.
He was a master craftsman who single-handedly built his beautiful house from the ground up. Freddie was also great at growing fruit trees, grilling chicken and ribs, popping wheelies on his Harley at 50 mph, making everyone feel appreciated, and hitting Coke bottles at thirty yards with his .45.
When it came to floor covering, Freddie was one of the best in the business. And he loved doing it. Freddie loved to tell stories. And you could be sure 50% of every story was true. You just never knew which 50%.
Marshall Matt Dillon, Ben Cartwright, and Charlie Harper were his TV heroes. And he was the hero for his six children: Mark, Shain, Clint, Brandice, Ashley, and Thomas.
Freddie adored the ladies. And they adored him. There isn't enough space here to list all of the women from Freddie's past. There isn't enough space in the Bloomingdale phone book. A few of the more colorful ones were Momma Margie, Crazy Pam, Big Tittie Wanda, Spacy Stacy, and Sweet Melissa (he explained that nickname had nothing to do with her attitude). He attracted more women than a shoe sale at Macy's.
He got married when he was 18, but it didn't last. Freddie was no quitter, however, so he gave it a shot two more times. It didn't work out with any of the wives, but he managed to stay friends with them and their parents.
In between his many adventures, Freddie appeared in several films including *The Ordeal of Dr. Mudd, A Time for Miracles, The Conspirator, Double Wide Blues*, and *Pretty Fishes*.
When Freddie took off for that pool party in the sky, he left behind his sons Mark McCullough, Shain McCullough and his wife Amy, Clint McCullough and his wife Desiree, and Thomas McCullough and his wife Candice; and his daughters Brandice Chambers and her husband Michael, Ashley Cooler and her husband Justin; his brothers Jimmie and Eddie McCullough; and his girlfriend Lisa Hopkins; and seven delightful grandkids.
Freddie was killed when he rushed into a burning orphanage to save a group of adorable children. Or maybe not. We all know how he liked to tell stories.
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